Home > Creative Writing Exercises, Wessed Up History > Wessed-Up History – 3/8/2010

Wessed-Up History – 3/8/2010

* March 1: It’s National Pig Day! Celebrate slovenliness! Be a chauvenist! No one can hold it against you! (If you saw it on the Internet, it has to be true. Right?)
* March 2, 1901: Congress passes the Platt Amendment, requiring a space opera MUSH in every house, quarterly website revamps, and PINEAPPLE!
* March 3, 1882: After scamming millions of other sperm into blowing their chance at fertilizing an egg with the promise of a BETTER egg coming soon, Charles Ponzi is born.
* March 4, 1791: After paying a ransom of 14-million bottles of pure maple syrup, Vermont is admitted as 14th state.
* March 5, 1904: Nikola Tesla first describes the process of “ball lightning” and introduces the first fiberglas-insulated diaper.
* March 6, 1946: David Gilmour rides a flying pig out of the womb on a burst of green laser light while doctors trip on LSD.
* March 7, 1934: Infant Willard Scott broadcasts first forecast from the womb – humid, with a chance of placenta.

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